The initial announcement:

Nov 6, 2009, at 8:05 PM
From: Ray
To: neighborhood email list (104 email recipients)
Hi,
Here's a link to the pictures I took at Halloween:
http://www.unrelated.net/homefrnt/09oct31h/index.html 
Enjoy,
Ray

The first five replies:

• Thank you so much! Great pictures!

• Those pictures are fantastic....you captured so many of the neighborhood kids!
  Thanks for sharing....I really appreciate it! ; )

• Thanks for the pictures!

• Thank you...Great pictures!

• Thank you Ray. In the midst of getting ready for the parade and the after party,
  I forgot to take any pictures of my kids and I saw a couple of my kids in your pictures.
  Thanks again

Twelve days later, a  message from M-1 to Ray:

11/18/2009 4:37:26 P.M.
From: M-1 
To: Ray
Ray,
I live in Ridgewood and attended this year's Halloween parade and  
after party, where I noticed you taking pictures. I have made a point  
of not posting any photos of my children on the Internet and I was  
surprised to find that you had posted images from those events without  
asking for consent beforehand. I would like you to take down all  
images of my children and, to be honest, several other parents have  
expressed similar sentiments and I think it would be in the best  
interest of everyone involved if you simply removed all those photos.  
I am a journalist and photographer and I have always strived to adhere  
to the rules of the profession, which require that any photos taken at  
a private event not be distributed without the expressed written  
consent of the subjects. Please advise me when you have taken these  
photos down.
M-1

Ray's internal dialog while reading M-1's email:

• I live in Ridgewood and attended this year's Halloween parade and  after party, where I noticed you taking pictures.
  
  That's nice. Odd he didn't speak to me, as quite a few others did, either at the parade or the party.
   

• I have made a point of not posting any photos of my children on the Internet and I was  surprised to find that you had posted images from those events without asking for consent beforehand.
  
  Yep, that is what I do, but I make no secret of it. I wonder which of the one hundred and four people I told 10 days ago spilled the beans? But at a public event with lots of people taking pictures of children and adults, many of whom are in costume, I have no sense of obligation, no requirement, and generally no inclination to ask permission from everyone who crosses my lens. I am surprised someone with photo issues didn't speak up.
   

• I would like you to take down all images of my children and, to be honest, several other parents have  expressed similar sentiments ...
  
  OK. I guess I saw this coming back in the second sentence. It's an unusual request, but not unheard of. Maybe the third I've had since getting into this activity in the mid '90s. Strange that he didn't say which pictures were problems for him. The only other feedback I've gotten so far has been expressions of pleasure and gratitude, so the others have not contacted me. Perhaps this fellow is the kind of communicator that nobody will disagree with (we all know the type).
   

• ... and I think it would be in the best  interest of everyone involved if you simply removed all those photos.
  
  Now I'm wondering who elected this fellow to speak for everyone? This strikes me as high-handed. What gives him the right to make such a suggestion? This fellow appears to have no clue that he does not represent everyone else.
   

• I am a journalist and photographer ...
  
  Interesting. Such an aggressive and thoughtless email, coming from a supposed professional, calls into question the training and criteria for that profession, or the individual's qualifications.


 

• ... and I have always strived to adhere to the rules of the profession, which require that any photos taken at a private event not be distributed without the expressed written consent of the subjects.
  
  Also interesting, given he appears to not understand the concept of public domain. The photos were taken at a public parade and a public party, in the outdoors, either in the road or visible from the road.
   

• Please advise me when you have taken these photos down.
  
  Arrogant, for starters, then absurd. I suppose I ought to relpy, and also let the neighborhood "M-1" has suggested I should remove the halloween pictures from the internet.

Response to M-1

On Nov 18, 2009, at 6:01 PM
From: Ray
To: M-1
cc: neighborhood list 

Hi M-1,
 
Sorry to hear you are so paranoid.
 
Thanks for your opinion regarding what would be in everyone's 
best interest, but I disagree.
 
I also disagree with your various other suppositions.
 
I have no intention of taking down any pictures I have posted.
 
Please advise me when you get over yourself.
 
Ray

Reply email from M-1

11/18/2009 6:48:55 P.M.
From: M-1 writes:
To: Ray
cc: neighborhood list

I have every right to decide what images of my children go out into the world, 
especially considering you did not ask me for permission to photograph them. 
I have made a conscious decision, the reasons for which are, frankly, none of 
your business, to not have images of my children online. That is my right as a 
parent and it makes me neither paranoid nor a spokesperson for anyone else in 
the neighborhood except myself and my family.

I expect now that you have copied others in the neighborhood you will find that 
I am not alone in these feelings. I don't know you, have never met you and have 
no idea if you have children or grandchildren, but this is a violation of my 
privacy and suspect you would feel similarly violated if someone took this 
attitude with you.
Your rude response to my reasonable request makes me even more uncomfortable 
about that fact that you took pictures of my children without asking.

M-1

Reply to second email from M-1

11/18/2009 7:46:20 P.M.
From: Ray
To: M-1
cc to neighborhood list

Little do you know.

Message to Ray from F-1 (a functionary with local civic association)

I11/18/2009 7:46:55 P.M.
From: F-1
To: Ray

Ray,
I appreciate your enthusiasm for taking pictures of our kids at the Halloween 
parade/party.  I do have to say, though, some of us neighbors were wondering 
who was taking pictures and what was going to be done with them.  I think if 
you would have asked permission first, people wouldn't have been so concerned.  
Personally, I thought your response was very rude to M-1 and he deserves an 
apology.  We often use pictures in our Neighborhood newsletters, but have never 
posted anything on the internet.  This is really something the Civic Association
should look at in the future.  
F-1

Reply to F-1

11/18/2009 8:02:25 P.M.
From: Ray
To: F-1
cc: neighborhood list

Thanks for your note, F-1.

I've lived in Ridgewood over 15 years and am not unknown. Several people 
did ask who I was and what I might do with the pictures I was taking, and 
they were told that I would post them on the internet and possibly on 
the CityBeat and Zipscene photo pages.

That stated, I took those pictures for my personal use, and one of the things 
I personally do is post pictures of public events on the internet. I only 
informed our neighbors so they could enjoy them. Several replied with 
gratitude and enthusiasm.

Regarding the public versus private issue, the public roadway where the 
parade took place is fair game under any circumstances. The party, as it 
occurred outdoors, was fair game, too. As it happens, I did speak to the 
hostess and told her I'd be posting the pictures and even secured her email 
address, in case she wasn't on our email list. (That property is not, after 
all, actually in Ridgewood.)

Regarding my rudeness to M-1, I found his approach rude and high-handed, 
and I replied in kind. He can have an apology when hell freezes over. 
(Given that I am an atheist, I expect he'll have a long wait.)

Thanks again,

Ray

Message to Ray from M-2, another neighbor.

11/18/2009 8:09:21 P.M. 
From: M-2
To: Ray
cc: neighborhood list

I will say that I completely agree with m-1 and his feelings as a parent. We 
should expect that any decent person and good neighbor would respect the wishes 
of a parent for privacy of their family and children.
My opinion is that we should reasses who is allowed to take pictures at 
neighborhood events and prohibit any information going to the neighborhood facebook 
page. I for one will think twice about allowing my children to attend any event 
where mr owens is in attendance. 
I hope others that feel this way will also voice their opinion so individuals 
like this do not ruin our neighborhood and its events
M-2

Reply from Ray to M-2

11/18/2009 8:11:16 P.M. 
From: Ray
To: M-2
cc: neighborhood list

Do tell.